I couldn't have said it better....
"Love is more easily experienced than defined. As a theological virtue, by which we love God above all things and our neighbours as ourselves for his sake, it seems remote until we encounter it enfleshed, so to say, in the life of another – in acts of kindness, generosity and self-sacrifice. Love's the one thing that can never hurt anyone, although it may cost dearly. The paradox of love is that it is supremely free yet attaches us with bonds stronger than death. It cannot be bought or sold; there is nothing it cannot face; love is life's greatest blessing."
Felix was all of these things...so by definition "Love" is "Felix". .....was "Felix".
If love is Felix and Felix is no longer here...it means I don't have love anymore.
I am very much aware that my ability to love did not come from him. However, my ability to love deeply and freely came from him. This is the way he loved me and therefore taught me how to love. It was unselflish, unconditional, free but still in someway, consuming.
I didn't notice how wrapped up I was in his love until he was gone. My fear is that I will never have this again. Knowing that it is impossible simply because there was only one Felix and therefore his love was unique, tears me to pieces.
Today my sister asked me to define "What is Love". The only answer I have for her is "Felix". I am not so sure that I will ever be able to define it in another way. I don't know whether I have fallen out of love with Felix...I don't even know if it is possible. I know that I will always love him....deeply...but I know that I cannot remain in love with him forever.
I need to be able to define love differently and it cannot be Felix....atleast not all of it.
"Love is more easily experienced than defined. As a theological virtue, by which we love God above all things and our neighbours as ourselves for his sake, it seems remote until we encounter it enfleshed, so to say, in the life of another – in acts of kindness, generosity and self-sacrifice. Love's the one thing that can never hurt anyone, although it may cost dearly. The paradox of love is that it is supremely free yet attaches us with bonds stronger than death. It cannot be bought or sold; there is nothing it cannot face; love is life's greatest blessing."
Felix was all of these things...so by definition "Love" is "Felix". .....was "Felix".
If love is Felix and Felix is no longer here...it means I don't have love anymore.
I am very much aware that my ability to love did not come from him. However, my ability to love deeply and freely came from him. This is the way he loved me and therefore taught me how to love. It was unselflish, unconditional, free but still in someway, consuming.
I didn't notice how wrapped up I was in his love until he was gone. My fear is that I will never have this again. Knowing that it is impossible simply because there was only one Felix and therefore his love was unique, tears me to pieces.
Today my sister asked me to define "What is Love". The only answer I have for her is "Felix". I am not so sure that I will ever be able to define it in another way. I don't know whether I have fallen out of love with Felix...I don't even know if it is possible. I know that I will always love him....deeply...but I know that I cannot remain in love with him forever.
I need to be able to define love differently and it cannot be Felix....atleast not all of it.
No comments:
Post a Comment